No Contact vs. Limited Contact?

[Little Grasshopper]

Hey folks, I could really use some advice on my situation!

My ex broke up with me and friend-zoned me about a month and a half ago. There were still feelings between us, and the last time I saw him he said ‘it’s very hard for me to walk away from you. Regardless, he didn’t want to be with me and I agreed to be friends.

A week ago, he called me and I ignored it. The next day I texted him and very gently and respectfully told him I needed space. He responded quickly and said that was alright, and ‘feel free to message in the future anytime’. We haven’t spoken since.

I’ll be moving to another city at the end of the month for school, temporarily, but I’ll be back often since this is my home.
I want to continue no contact but I know he’ll reach out right before I leave. I haven’t decided if I want him back, but I’d like to keep the door open. Should I switch to Limited Contact and say goodbye? I’m worried that saying goodbye would give him closure to move on from me…
Maybe I should be more mysterious to just leave silently? Would this be too rude and damaging?

Thanks!!

[patricia12]

Were you dating only a month?

[Little Grasshopper]

Yes, we dated for a month and we’ve been broken up for a month and a half.

[patricia12]

Two people dating only one month are just getting to know each other. Firstly, to see if they are compatible and enjoy each others company. Strong feeling and love develop over time and one month is much too short a time for that to happen! Guys take an average of at least 3 months or more to be sure if they want a relationship or friendship. In other words, the feelings and memories play a part.

Since you’re moving away for school soon, but will be back at intervals, this is not the time to ignore him and distance yourself from him. Let him know when you’re leaving and hope to see him sometimes when you take trips back home. Only by contacting each other via texts, emails, calls, and seeing each other in person, will you both know what you want. He said to message him any time, so that’s a great sign that he likes you very much. Be sweet and happy when you contact him or see him and see where it goes..

You might be interested in these articles as well.

How To Get Your Ex Back If You are Moving Away Soon

and

No Contact Rule

[Little Grasshopper]

Thanks Patricia for your advice, you’ve made me feel a lot better 🙂

[Author]

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