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I’m on day 1 of NC and I need some encouragement. On one hand I think this is a great idea but I’m also scared in the mean time he’ll take it as I don’t care and move on. We dated for over 2 years. But he broke up with me because he lost feelings so I feel like no contact would be a relief to him or something. Also how should I approach social media? I haven’t posted or done anything because I feel like he’ll be curious to how I’m doing and if I’m not on social media or talking to him, he’ll have no clue. He texted me yesterday and said he loved me to death and told me never to lose hope. Which is leaving me really confused. Need encouragement that this will work out and that NC is a good idea.
Also, relationship rewind said that NC isn’t a good idea so now I’m confused which route to take too!Hey I just read your post and I’m in the same situation sorta, my ex of over 2 years and I just split yesterday. And we had a long distance relationship because of college and we would text 24/7 and FaceTime every night when we slept and everything so this is all a big shock and transformation going from talking everyday for 2 years to no contact. He ended it because he wasn’t sure what he wanted and he didn’t think it was fair to drag me into it when he was unsure of the outcome. We had plans together in October for a vacation and he told me he still really wants to go with me but I’m scared that’ll change considering there’s a lot of time between now and then. My question is how is the NC going? Are you guys back together?
4th day here. 11 Days since the break up. I am still missing her just as bad, if not worse.
At this point I just wish I could be friends with her.
Hey guys well I’m here for support. I wish I could give more than just encouragement but as I am currently going in circles w my ex I’m not to sure what to say.
I’m in 4 months since the break up, we talk now because he doesn’t wanna lose me, but idk what to do or how to feel when he gets all up to me when he’s drunk or that he claims to still care about how I feel and tries to touch me while I feel bad, he also keeps saying it’s not the same kind of care as back then.
Oh well, I think if your ex is talking to you it may be a good sign but remember not to come across as needy and desperate. I know it’s hard not to cry or say something but remember it’s about you and not them. Anyways I’m here if you need me.
Hey it seems so, they have been exchange a lot of heart-to-heart emails apparently. Not sure what I should do now
I don’t know what I should advice you either…give it some time maybe? Dunno… She seems to be struggling emotionally.
As for me, it’s been 6 months exactly tomorrow since I last saw her and even though I know they are fine and living together and stuff…I still miss her and lately I’ve been dreaming so much with her that it’s not even funny. Is this ever going to be gone…
We broke up May 13th after being together for almost three years. Of course, I did all the desperate and needy stuff. Before discovering this site, I told her I would not contact her for at least two weeks and after that, I would keep going.
June 30th will be two weeks of NC. Is NC pointless since I told her I would not contact her? Or should NC go longer?
I try not to think about it so much but I have been having a lot of dreams with her in them and it makes me want to just contact though I never do contact because I know it’s all mind games.
Just need some help here on what to do?
Wow,@martin, @archola, good to see you!
I have been off almost 9 months, and althougg I have heard he has asked for me, I no longer want him back. I know that if I see him again in person I may have second thoughts but I keep thinking all the bad stuff he had done simce the begining of our relationship and those traits he wont change. I wont give him a third opportunity to get away with his imbecility and selfishness. Right now I am still seeing this guy I met at the gym once a week. We joke a lot and he gives me great advice. Only problem is he is still in a messy relationship with a clinging girlfriend he has broke off with a zillion times. He feels guilty because she tried to kill herself and he is slowly drifting away from her to avoid a bigger mess. But thats not because of me solely, I mean we havent spoken about anything serious. We just give love and support to each other. I am sometimes having a great time and start thinking “damn! Why all this great time could not be spent with him, my ex? Most probably I had to break free from that bad relationship to have all the great times I am having, sont know. I moss him sometimes, and I also cry every now and then. But I convinced myself not to look back. And I think you guys should do the same, try to get to someone new, even if in the begining is not the same perfect relationship we all thought we had with our exes, or what we would want for ever, but ot helps tons, it has worked for me, even though I swore I would never be on rebounds. Dont force it,just be open to the possibilities and the right one will approach you. It happened to me, i had been seeing this guy at the gym for at least one year but was blinded by my pain and suffering the loss of my 8 year relationship. For every thing there is a season they say.
Well. It’s been a long time since I don’t write here. I am needing as much help as possible. PLEASE
My ex and I kept in contact after the breakup for two months. We never met for that coffee, it was all crazy and cold I must say, it was all text messages during and after breaking up.
Remind please that we broke up because he was moving to NYC and I was supposed to stay in Miami… that’s what he said at that time.
After that I had an offer to come and work to NYC as well and I accepted since the job and salary were so good… It took a huge toll for me to accept since I did not want him to think that I was accepting to retrieve our relationship, or giving us a second opportunity… However I faced the problem by letting him know that I work here now and that I am settling down for a bit. I let him know because I thought it was immature not doing it and meet him one random morning in the subway…
He texted me like four days ago and asked me how I was, and explained me that his life has been crazy for the last few weeks. That was all. I replied explaining him that I am busy too, on top looking for a rent here in Manhattan, blah blah blah…
He has not replied or said anything else… he is just in Grindr all the time.
This is killing me. I don’t know if I will ever see him again… and we are in the same city! I feel so frustrated… On one hand I don’t want to push him or text him, or do anything else. On the other, I would like to let him know how I really feel. Can’t get him out of my heart and head. Please advise me!!!!!!!!!hi
for me, day 2 of NC/day 10 of breaking upthe first week after break up, we still messaged to each other (as friend). we had little met up in day 9 of breaking up.there’re her friends, my ex and me. most of all that time, they happily and funny talked about my ex’s new crushes-how to talk to them/will they okay with my ex/how much my ex like them/bla bla..
That’s the last day of talking with her.When she have no care/respect and also ruin my feeling, so my care for her is done too!
Most of all, I start NC for myself to become the stronger person and to move on my life.Although I know that some corner of my heart still love her and need her back.
When I feel down, I love to read other’s posts and comments here.they’re the important inspiration for me to keep making the NC!
Have a good day 🙂
Im only on day 3 but its very hard. I go through a range of emotions. From happiness to sadness to regret to disgust to being slightly annoyed. I never get angry though. I wish I would, just because I feel like it would help me move on. I have this new thing that I do that really seems to be working. Whenever Im not being conscious of it, things around me triggers happy memories of us (they are usually very vivid memories) and I start to fell nostalgic and I start to miss him….very badly. Whenever this happens I think back to some advice I read on this site. “Concentrate on you during the NC period”. All I say to myself is Me ME ME and then I thoughts disappear and I either stop thinking completely or I just think about what I’ll be doing later today. It weird because I did this at work and not only did it have a mental affect on me but also physical one. When I start to miss him I feel heavy, my heart hurts and my eyes get watery. After doing this I felt …. Normal. Like back before the relationship normal……
Its VERY Weird and I can not explain how this works but it just does.
Day 20.
It’s worse than ever. Anticipation is eating me alive. I’m half crazy.
I’m not nearly ready to contact him. I think I will have to go another 30 or even 60 days NC.
I thought I would pull myself together until now. But I’m such a mess.
I feel, if I contact him and he doesn’t answer or at least feel happy about hearing me and gives me some kind of hope, that I’ll sink completely. Al least, now I’m still floating. It’s bad.
day 21
My brain is determined to destroy me. I can’t help but picking memories, contemplate, remembering… everything that went on in our relationship. I’m remembering some details I thought I forgot.
My head is hell.
I am not half crazy anymore. I’m officially crazy.
NC day 1… We were together 3 years…I broke NC several times over the past 2 months. I couldn’t stand the pain and panic of not hearing from him,…he replied in anger to please leave him time to find some peace and I wouldn’t listen…he told me to move on, meet people, fix myself..so today he told me to give him 3 weeks…but I don’t want to be the one to make contact, as I’m learning I shouldn’t…I wish I could know that if I follow the guidelines…will he miss me? Will he stop being angry? Will time really work and will he reconsider even though he told me we could see in 2 years?
I am half crazy too… maybe all crazy
Day 8
23 days ago I told my ex of 18 months I cannot see him anymore. We had some content after this, texts, missed phone calls. He got married last Saturday. No reply to my last few texts to him, hence I told myself I cannot contact him again. I am in suspense – wondering if he will call or text me, wondering if he has ‘deleted’ me, wanting to contact him badly – yes I am all crazy…..
9 months ago, after a selling our house, he started saying he wants to have sex with me. I say No, he is living with someone else. 3 months ago he tells me he is gonna marry his new girl – my resolve crumbles; I start seeing him a couple of times a week and having sex.
I hate not having him in my life, I hate he is with other girl and not me….
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