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Posts
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@kaila and @justinlove
She broke up with me to pursue someone else who she has been dating now for 4months now.
We won’t meet till at least mid may so I got sometime.
Yeah regardless of anything I’d still openly flirt with him and wouldnt care if it annoys her :p
Hi @Martin
Hows things going? How long had you been in NC for until she contacted you? I take it she contacted you first? Anyhow seems like positive news if you still want to try and reconcile.
I am getting really fed up of still feeling pretty low and massively missing my Ex and I still cant stop thinking about her and her new boyfriend. The nice sunny warm weather is making me feel worse as we used to do lots of things in the summer.
I try to concentrate on improving myself and I am starting a new job/career on Monday but I feel I kind of made the decision to swap jobs under the influence of my ex to try and show her I am more ambitious even though I really enjoy the job I am currently in and have been in for the last 5 and half years. I keep feeling I am making the wrong decision and my ex now doesn’t care one bit what I do.
I really thought after 6 months I would have got close to reconciling or I would have moved on a little but it is really hard still. I have tried everything but I still cant get her off my mind.
The worse thing is thinking that she will be settling down with this new man and getting married and having kids etc. This really hits my self esteem as I see myself as “the mistake and bad boyfriend which told my ex what she really wants out of a relationship and boyfriend”
They too have been seeing each other for about 4 months and she has told me they are planning a future together. I hate feeling this way and wish I could get out of this slump but all hopes of reconciliation are lost. I keep beating myself up about it and going over past mistakes and wishing I could turn back the clock. She really did love me at one point and we had a good thing going and I cant believe how she has moved on so quick.
What’s up boys and girls?
So after all this time…I’m better. I’m feeling better. I’ve been going to play football with my mates, running, I’m getting better. We broke up like 5 months ago, 4 months since she became together with someone else, 3 months since I last saw her and that she cheated on him with me. I genuinely am getting better. But today I found out something. I saw that they moved in together. I couldn’t help but laugh. I still have feelings for her, love even but I just laugh at this. Because it’s fucking ridiculous. They are together for like 4 months and already living together? Isn’t this odd and ridiculous and childish? Like…what the fuck?
@archola
Does your ex have issues with being alone? I believe mine did as she wanted me to move in only 3 months into the relationship. I told her a better idea would be to wait a year, which in the end we didn’t even last that long.I genuinely don’t know. We were together for like 3.5years and she was always talking about marrying and living together but that wasn’t only 4 months after we started. I mean she just 21, he just turned 20,are in a relationship for 4 months after being with someone for over 3 years and already moved in together? This does not make any sense whatsoever. Not to me at least.
@archola and @lustinlove
My ex and her new boyfriend are now living together too and it’s only 4 months in. I know my girlfriend has issues with being alone….but what does that mean and how does that effect things with regards to rebounds etc?? Personally I can’t see that as being too much of an issue as when you think about it no one really enjoys too much time being alone. It seems on the outside that they both seem very happy?
It’s good to hear your feeling good about things @archola and moving on positively
Got any tips and advice? I too run and play football with friends and have a pretty busy life but I still check her Facebook even though she hardly ever updates it and I still can’t get her off my mind? What’s the best way to stop this madness haha?@Tommys83 Being alone you mean living alone? Yeah, that is true, but my ex was living with her mom and I really can’t get around my head how someone moves in to live with a partner just in this short time, considering she still carries all the baggage from our relationship…wich ended like 3 weeks before they got together. And considering everything she told me the last time we saw each other…it’s mind blowing and I just laugh.
Any tips? I’m not really a role model myself 😀 I still check her fb, her social networks and etc but I don’t feel as much bothered as I used to. I still have deep feelings for her but I feel so hurt…I try to distract myself, being with friends, playing games, watching movies, series, etc. It helps. I still look at her pictures, our stuff, still imagine us together, because you know…it was really strong what we had but there’s a time you need to face the reality. I am on that point now. I’m starting to think that maybe I wasn’t completely happy with her. Things i do now, she would complain at me because she would want all the attention for herself and I’m starting to realise that now. And that is another motive why i don’t get how they went this fast. Apparently her new bf is doing everything she wants too. Dunno.
Hey guys, guess Im not the only one still struggling. Its been 6 minths now since the breakup, and in my case Im baffled because he has no one else (thank God), but is still very angry. We have tried to dobthings but his anger soon explodes and he misinterprets all I say, and I get mad and run off again. I decided to stay as away as possible, we both play in a band, and I declined a new gig on 4/17, but still doing the one 5/2 because ot is a big one. I cut cords again with him since Saturday, and just now he sent me an email with a link to free threading of Game of Thrones, a series he got to know because of me, and we used to watch together. I thanked him he replied politely back, and thats it. I will keep the nc the best I can. Im having nights and days from hell still. But I have managed to be very succesful in taking back my life and interests and Everything else is great, only Im too lonely. i started texting and talking to a trainer in my gym, he is cute and funny but I just see him as friend and a way to syart moving on.
Hi @Tommys83
Sorry for the late reply, I have been missing in action for sometime. I was in no contact for atleast 22 days before she contacted me. In short, I contacted her in mid March and passed the ball to her court, so she probably felt like she had to. Anyway nothing has been firmly arranged with it still being in the air. Its not entire positive news because I feel she is trying to friendzone me, she has been dating the guy she broke up with me for.
I understand how you feel, I feel the same about the summer weather…it makes me feel nostalgic everytime I go outside. I do keep relapsing after a period of time but its quite infrequent now.
Our ex has no reason to care about us anymore. I just try to think that she doesnt exist and just move on. I have accepted that we would never ever meet. I think you should also get rid of the hope mentality. NC was never designed to get our ex back, its more to help us move on.
I tried to look at every angle in whether I can get her back and in all of them my hands our tied. Even in the horoscope (my moon sign and her sun sign) it says that we will eventually bid good-byes for good.
I guess we will have just have to wait for the right oppurtunity to when to strike; right now I know that my time is not right.
It would be good if there was a way to talk a bit more privately, annoyingly this forum does not have a PM system.
That looks like a text book rebound! I think some girls feel unstable to not be in a relationship.
11 days of NC so far … no contact made by my ex, but it’s understandable because of her current circumstances.
Here’s my story so you can be filled in https://www.forum.exbackpermanently.com/boards/topic/my-nc-experience-so-far/
Would love to hear encouraging advice about this … bear in mind I’m trying to get back with her.
If you give her the time and space she deserves, she will come around.
You seem to already have everything figured out hence I know you will be fine.
I hope you’re right @Martin, I really miss her.
I constantly wonder if she’s thinking about me and missing me as much as I am.
Does it matter that we aren’t friends on FaceBook anymore and that she deleted photos of me?
How am I going to make contact with her? Will a letter be good enough?
It’s been 16 days since the original break up. Ive broken NC 3 times now. The first time I broke NC was not to bad. We didn’t talk about the break up or relationship at all. I called her because I wanted to, and Invited her out to Coffee just to talk. It went by okay. Felt a little awkward. Went a few more days and called her telling her I would like to see her, and she said she wasn’t too comfortable with it. And yes I understood, she told me to wait another week. She texted me one night around 10oclock and I didn’t answer, and she called me when I didn’t reply to the texts. The next day I happen to see her walking down the street while I was driving so I stopped and talked to her, we ended up going for a run together, I called her later that night just to talk and catch up, but the conversation shifted to more about our relationship when I asked if she wanted to go mini golfing the next week. I messed up here telling her that I still have feelings for her, that I miss her, and I still love her, I think about her before I fall asleep, and she’s the girl that I want to spend my time with.
I know every time I break NC it’s hurting my chances. But I do speak the truth I still love her. And I know she still had feelings for me. I want to give her, her space so she can realize that on her own.
How many times can I restart NC? Is it okay to restart? I keep feeling so confident about talking to her, I feel that Im ready, but she’s not, and I don’t know how I will tell if she is.
Today is day 2 of NC (round 2). The first was only 5 days and I replied to his plethora of texts asking how I am and if I’m ok. I had said to please just leave me alone and eventually it turned into a conversation which he was in control of and I’m sure I seemed needy.
Today is very tough. Your birthday is in a week and I know you don’t like to celebrate it much and it’s “just another day” for you but I remember the past 3 of your birthdays we spent together and it’s going to be so difficult not being able to do the special things I had planned. I had already taken off work to come see you and spend time with you and the family for your birthday but now I will have to find something else to do.
Today i feel extremely scared. I know you said you just want to be alone for a while and try to understand your feelings and yourself but I’m so afraid that you are trying to allow yourself to heal so you can move on and try pursuing these feelings for her
I am afraid to lose you for good. I keep trying to think of the end result of NC that we will eceny be back in each other’s arms. I know how much you care about me and I know you love me as I could see it on your face the last time we spoke. So I will keep thinking that and keep telling myself this is all worth it. I want to be happy and I want you to be happy as well.Been 13 days of NC so far … haven’t heard from my ex. I went NC as soon as we broke up, but I did beg at least twice when she ended it with me (I don’t know if that’ll affect my chances).
I went out last night with some friends for the hell of it … I had a good time, but I almost tried to contact her – luckily I didn’t.
I still wonder about her all the time, I constantly ask whether she’s thinking about me, whether she still loves me and also if she misses me and still cares.
Her FaceBook hasn’t changed since, apparently, but she has deleted a photo of me.
I guess that’s probably in retaliation of be un-friending her on there …. she hasn’t blocked me (yet) … maybe she’s keeping contact lines open(?)
I’ve already decided that I’m going to send her a letter, because I know it’ll shock her and possibly shock her emotionally. I’ll follow Kevin’s recommendation and tell her that I accept the break up, etc …
The only think I’m not sure about is whether to send it when this month is over … OR to send it after her exams in 2 months time??
Help!
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