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Posts
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No, she didnt say they were getting married, just that they had been planning a future together and I just have a strong feeling thats what she is looking to do within the next few months or so and i am so scared it will happen. Like you said, it does seem a bit rushed but she does sound very happy and in love with this new guy already. Maybe I left my NC too long? Maybe I had no chance all along? I dont know, I’m Struggling to cope. Thank you for your reply and i hope your doing well.
Hey everyone I have a question about NC. To get to the point me and my ex have a daughter together and i see her 3-4 times a week and on the days I don’t see her I want to know how she is. If I just text or email my ex asking how my daughter is doing is that ok? I know that NC is complete no talking but we have a 2 year old daughter and I love her with all my heart I want to know how she is doing especially on days when I don’t see her.
I will strictly only mention how my daughter is doing(she lives with my ex) anything else she brings up I will not reply back as I’m only 1 day into NC and still working on myself(NC will probably last me close to 40-50 days).
Any thoughts on that would be great thanks!
It is valentines in 3 days and my ex will have a great romantic time with him.
How am I going to win this?
Well of course I can’t do anything and all I can do is nothing so I feel bad as I still see her as the love of my life. It has been 3 months since we broke up but my feelings towards her has only got stronger and purer.
Going on a date today.
Good on you mate. If you try to clear your mind of your ex you will see that it really does help to go on the odd date as long as you try not to expect much from it.
Vday/my birthday coming up and I have just got confirmation from my ex that she has been seeing someone since 30 dec. she said they haven’t spent a day apart and they are planning their future together so I am feeling lower than I have ever felt. I’m pretty sure they will end up getting serious soon as he is 34 and ready to settle and she is 27 and ready to settle as well. I’m an absolute mess and I don’t know what to do.
All the best for your date buddy. Go and have Fun!
Yeah in the same boat. My ex has been seeing this new guy since 18th December.
Well if our exes love us they would return, if there was no love there they would not; this is what I have been telling myself.
My bday is coming up too at the end of the month; I feel that would be the last time I would ever hear from my ex.
Hey can someone answer my question I posted? You guys are really all I have no one else even knows I’m going through tough times and I appreciate any answers. Thanks
Me and my ex of 4 years have been split 6 months now. During that time we have come very close to getting back but she gets talked out of it by her nana. (this has been confirmed by my ex and her nana is very controlling of her even though my ex is 24 she never goes against her.)
She has now told me she is sort of seeing someone else and he took her away for her birthday. She has been adamant that nothing sexual has happened but they have kissed and are spending more time together.
We have a daughter together and work in the same department at work so see her daily and can’t do no contact properly but I know we can make it work and be very happy as a family if only given the chance.
We are still on quite good terms and I’m sure she is still attracted to me and loves me but is burying it deep.
I just don’t know how to think or what to do.
Any help or advice would be appreciated@kevinsmusicrox I can’t give proper advice on that aspect of your situation. I think confusedbutok or martin would be able to help you with that. My ex is angry and blaming any time I try to talk to him, so I don’t have that part figured out yet, haha.
@Tommys83 Hey! It’s been a while! It sounds like you did really well during NC. I’m sorry you are going through all this. I think your ex and her new guy are in honeymoon stage big time. I think they are both going to be in for a rude awakening. It takes more than a month or two to get to know a person, and everyone is on their best behavior for the first 2-3 months anyway. I think they are rushing in way too quickly. I also don’t think your ex took time to figure herself out after your break either. I know that it hurts but I wouldn’t let this beat you down.
@confusedbutok I’m glad the message worked out so well. I wouldn’t take what your ex says seriously, haha. She said just a week ago for you not to message her or she would block you, and well, look where you are now? 😀
@teamjordan12 I think it would be okay to ask about your daughter once in a while. How often are you planning on checking in? You don’t want to overdo it or accidentally fall into the habit of using it as way to talk to your ex or anything. I think you have a good idea of what you need to do based on your post.@Nell
Yeah maybe lol. She’s so hot/cold during that brief exchange she was so warm to me then dropped off and hasn’t replied since. So strangeI have a question for you guys. You can read all my other novel like threads if you want a back story but I will keep this short. He has a new girlfriend that isn’t allowing us to be in contact with each other, doesn’t want us friends. He has been flat out ignoring me even when I needed him most, so I have decided to do indefinite NC until there is a time I feel like he has given me sufficient reason to be friends again.
The new girlfriend made him take his name off the utilities at the apartment we still rent together. She probably would make him take his name off the lease if that was even possible at this point. Today I got a final notice letter from the power company for the old bills I gave him cash for but he never paid. When we lived together I had to constantly remind him to pay the bills and they were frequently late. I now have service under my name at the apartment, so this bill won’t affect me, but I called and they said it could shut off his power at his new apartment. They assured me he would get plenty of future bills in the next month or so before they shut it off and charge him a huge fee, but that is assuming he a) checks his mail b) changed his mailing address with them (I can’t access that info with them) c) pays the freaking bill for once.
Should I just leave it alone and let him find out on his own what it is like to not have me there to remind him to pay his bills or face the consequences etc and let him figure it out, possibly after his power is shut off. Or, should I attempt to email or facebook message him about it on the off chance the girlfriend isn’t still screening his phone and deleting every text, voicemail, email, etc that I have ever sent him? I truly don’t want to deal with him right now and want to move on and feel good with NC. But I still love him more than anything on this planet and he is my best friend, soulmate, blah blah, so not telling him and letting him suffer feels wrong. I don’t really know what to do :/
@confusedbutok I think maybe that’s normal? I thought Kevin sent out an email about hot/cold behavior at some point, but I can’t remember. It also made me think of this video: http://youtu.be/06s_5J65w7c?list=PLBHfQVp_OsaWyaUvEIvKgJNCj6VbVeDia
@knitterz I wouldn’t do anything. What’s going on with him and his bills isn’t your responsibility anymore. It’s up to him to be responsible and take care of himself. If the new girlfriend is so controlling or whatever, maybe she can deal with it, lol. The utility company will get in contact with him. I don’t think you should be worrying about it right now, and he won’t suffer if something gets shut off. If he doesn’t handle it and his utilities get shut off, then it’s a lesson he needed to learn.
Do you any of you guys have any of Kevin’s daily emails saved? He used to always send them out but not anymore. They really helped me get through the day. Please let me know if anyone could send me some and also help me out with my problem I mentioned earlier!!
@Nell
That’s interesting, video made some good points. But every time her and I have been in contact she would be the one to bring up the relationship, not me. I never talk about it or try convincing her to get back together. My texts have been casual, but who knows maybe she’s afraid where they’ll lead.What do you suggest, going back into NC? Also I’m curious if you use kik messenger. My name on there is: smiling_is_easy
@confusedbutok I think it’s good that you don’t bring any of that stuff up. I’m a little surprised she has. You’ve already done NC, I don’t really see a point in going back in. Just take it slow I guess? I don’t have kik but I’ll grab it.
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