-
Posts
-
Yes this weekend in my birthday, and I’m going away for the weekend. I’m looking forward to it.
I’m sure I will just receive a happy birthday text, don’t expect anything else really. I did something for hers in the fall, but it would be weird for her to do something for me I’d imagine.
How are you today?
im glad you have a fun weekend planned. that will be great.
today i woke up a little sadder than i have the past few weeks. i guess the reality is starting to sink in more and it sucks. its weird to think he’s really out of my life and to have absolutely no idea whats been going on in his head. i think content was the word you used yesterday and i guess thats just how i feel. nothing i can do to change the situation it just sucks.
Hope you all had a good weekend
So she texted me early on my birthday and I didn’t respond back.I just didn’t feel like responding at that moment. She texted me fairly early and it woke me up lol. Later on at night about 10 hours later I got another text from her, she said just wanted to make sure I got her text since I didn’t respond and Is hoping I’m having a good birthday. She hopes I’m going out or am out and such. It’s just weird, I don’t owe her a text back after all this time. Why does she care so much, but not want to be with me. The second text was really not necessary. I still havnt responded back to her, I probably will tomorrow and say thanks and such.
Also, her brother texted me about an hour after her to wish me a good one. I’m not shocked because we still chat occassionally. This is where it gets a bit more strange. I received a text from her mother right before I left for my trip wishing me a happy birthday and a small message. Other than me sending her an email over the summer I havnt heard from her. I also never once texted her all the years I was with her daughter. I never even gave her my number. She had to get it from my ex or probably I think the brother. I did responded to the mom and brother to say thank you. It was a nice gesture but I never expected her mom to text me. I know her parents really did like me, but it’s weird for her to reach out now I feel.
I had a great weekend overall.
Hi Mike,
Did you have a good weekend? Good to have a change of scenery even if the heart is elsewhere I guess!
I think that’s the maddest thing ever her mum contacted you! Obviously they like you and maybe you are a topic of conversation in their household! Very strange after all this time they contact you I must say.
Clearly your ex still cares very much for you!
It is strange because it’s like not enough time has gone by to be just friends. If a few years had gone by and there is contact then it can be amicable but it’s too soon after the breakup for that.
there is something stopping her from coming back right now so hang on in there and keep busy with life.I know I’ve behaved very needy towards my ex and it’s probably the reason why he’s cut contact. However it’s like he doesn’t want to know how I am, if I’m ok, if I’m ok for money (he used to help me out a lot), how my son is etc.
how can someone do all that after 8 yrs together!?
I just don’t get it how someone can be so callus.Anyway, am off to meet Aphrodite later today! Whoop whoop!
Atea, how’s things with you?
Happy belated birthday, Mike! Let us know how today’s date goes! And Belle and Aphrodite, you too! 😀
My bday was also this weekend, got a message and a postcard (!) from the ex.. I thought it was a nice gesture, but nothing to write home about, just your generic birthday wishes.
Anyway, I don’t think it’s weird to have received messages from your ex’s family members. It just means they care about you and thought of you as family. It seems like something my parents would do or my ex’s parents also, if we had broken up on good terms. And since you responded to their texts, I can understand why your ex would send the 2nd text to make sure you got hers.. she still cares about you, and people want to reach out during someone’s birthday! You should say thanks 🙂
Hope everyone is doing well! I would assume everyone is doing better, since we’re all posting less frequently! All part of the healing process! 😛
mike, happy belated birthday! hope you had a great weekend and let us know how the date goes tonight. i agree that its strange that your ex would text you twice. obviously you got her text. when someone breaks up with you, they don’t get to choose whether or not you respond if/when they reach, so i think the second text was unnecessary on her part. once again i think you have the most confusing ex of all. why didn’t you respond and just thank her? are you still planning on having a talk with her? also my ex’s mom and sister do still reach out to me a decent amount but i always used to talk to both of them via text often, so i guess i don’t think its that strange. the last i heard from my ex’s mom was in january when she congratulated me on getting straight As first semester. I’m not even sure who told her. anyway its clear to me that your ex really does still care. any plan of action as of now?
belle, sorry to hear that your ex has cut contact. its really mind boggling to me. i don’t think i would ever be able to cut it off completely with my ex. the only way I’m doing it now is because he hasn’t reached out. if he did, i don’t think i would have it in me to ignore him. how long has it been since he’s spoken? in a way maybe this is better because it can give both of you time and space to heal properly and evaluate. but I’m with you – i don’t know how he could after 8 years not even check in with how you are doing. it really is very upsetting. I’m jealous about you meeting with aphrodite!! wish i could come meet you both but unfortunately still stuck in snow new york!
unimare, happy belated birthday! did you have a good day? that was a nice gesture by your ex i think. did you respond to that at all or was it just very generic and not worthy of a response? I’m not sure why I’ve placed so much emphasis on my ex reaching out on my birthday when it probably will probably just be what you’ve described, but i guess its the only time i can expect him to break nc first and i still feel no closure and last time we spoke he still told me he wasn’t sure if this was permanent so my birthday falling around the 8 month mark i think i was just kind of hoping he could give me some more clarity one way or the other. I’m not sure.
today is 30 days nc for me!!! i feel truly accomplished 🙂 i didn’t think i would come this far. i have no idea if my ex is still seeing the girl or not and he has not tried contacting me once and neither have i. its really surreal for me. its slowly kind of becoming the new norm for me which is good. i definitely seem to be healing overall. i find myself happy sometimes, thinking about him less, and back to my old hobbies. I’ve ended things with the guy i was seeing for the time being because after 7 years of a relationship I’ve been taking some time to really get to know myself! I’ve been focusing a lot on school, spending a lot of time with family and friends, and treating myself to lots of pampering and shopping! it feels good to feel like a semi normal person again. my ex is still always in the back of my mind and i still have a lot of hope that we can reconcile but i am no longer putting my life on hold for it. if he wants to come back it has to be from him and nothing i do. he knows where to find me if he wants to chat! if i haven’t heard from him until my birthday which is about 2 months from now I’m just going to see how he is and take it from there. if he’s cold and generic i think i will take that as we are finished if after 3 months nc thats how he reacts but if he calls or does something more personal and is interested in talking, catching up, etc. i think i will ask where his head is at. but i know if he doesnt come back, i will be ok! I’m in no rush to meet someone else right now but i really do feel myself healing and i know if he doesnt come back ill be just fine. i still don’t feel this is the end and i do think we will talk again and revisit it but for now I’m healing so thats whats important 🙂 it also helps me a lot to read these boards still. no offense to anyone else but a lot of people seem desperate and completely hung up solely on what they can do to get their ex back. it just reminds me how far I’ve come because thats exactly how i was 5 months ago. but now, I’m living life for me and focusing only on that and if my ex wants to come back great, but if not everything happens for a reason!
Yes, I responded! I texted him saying thanks. I wouldn’t compare our exes too much (any more), your ex still really loves you and probably knows you really well, so I’m sure when he reaches out on your birthday, it will be more personal. Also you’ve agreed to reevaluate your situation then, so depending on what he wants to say, the birthday wishes might reflect that decision as well.. And yes, I had a lovely day, thank you! A lot of friends reached out and I feel very loved and lucky to have such wonderful people in my life. I’m also chatting to some nice guys I met over tinder (no dates yet, though!) and some newly single friends are showing interest, so I’m feeling quite uplifted and confident. 🙂
CONGRATULATIONS on day 30!!! You’ve done an amazing job! Keep at it, this really is the only way to go in our situation. You will reach a more satisfying conclusion/closure at a later point in time, so you don’t have to worry about anything for now. It’s out of your hands and you can just focus on yourself until then. I’m so happy for your progress. 🙂
I’m having a busy morning, had a chance to skim some of the messages. Will read them all later and respond after my get together with this girl.
I didn’t respond to her because I didn’t want to have to have a conversation with her. I didn’t want to have to answer questions on what I was doing. I wanted to enjoy my night out with my friends and not have to think about her. That second message wasn’t cool but I didn’t let it bother me. I had a really great night.
Hope you all had a great weekend as well
yes when we spoke a month ago thats what we said, so who knows what will happen now. regardless i think its helping me keep nc for the time being knowing there will be an end point (initiated by him!) and i can ask what i need to for closure if need be. I’m glad you had a great day and have been feeling loved by so many people! i also feel thankful for such wonderful family and friends. everyone has been so amazing to me over the last 5 months. and I’m glad youre starting to have some interested single friends and tinder messages! its a little exciting i will admit!
thanks for congratulating me! i feel like now is the first time in the 5 months I’m confident that i want to hold up nc for my own healing and not to punish him. its necessary for now. and a plus is that it will force him to see what his life is truly like without me in it and if he’s still ok with that after a few months then he isn’t the right guy for me so its a good test. i agree that a time will come where i can get better closure but its still too early for that so i need to keep focusing on healing. even if we do reconcile, it wont last unless I’m properly healed first. and theres something nice about it being out of my hands. its like theres nothing for me to do but focus on myself and being happy and just see how he will act in the future.it feels good to finally be making some progress!!
Today is my 8th day of NC. So many thoughts cross my mind each day. About her, her rebound and the possibility that I’ve lost her forever. Gosh it’s so hard to move on! I wish I could just reverse the time and never ever let her go in the first place.
mike, i understand why you didn’t want to get into a discussion with her and be upset or confused. I’m glad you enjoyed your night with your friends! keep us posted on how the date goes and good luck!
Hi all,
I just want to let you all know that I had the great pleasure in meeting the most wonderful, beautiful Aphrodite!
She is indeed an Aphrodite or Infact maybe I’m thinking she is actually THE Aphrodite.
Had a great few hours chatting and could have easily carried on for another few!
Today has been a good day! Yay!
I’m glad atea is feeling stonger by the day and that Unimare is feeling un fazed by her ex’s effort in wishing her happy birthday, belated birthday wishes Unimare. Happy birthday Unimare!
Mike, let us know how the date goes!
im so jealous that belle and aphrodite got together today!! it must have been so fun to meet after disclosing so much information! I’m curious to know…were you surprised with how each other looked?!
im glad you had a good day, belle! i had a great day today. went on a bit of a shopping spree this morning and treated myself to some new things for spring in hopes of warm weather soon and to reward myself for 30 days nc and finishing my midterms! also made myself a nice meal tonight. lots to be happy about!
hope everyone is feeling strong!
Hello all,
Happy belated birthday unimare!
My date went well I guess. Spent like 3 hours together having a few drinks and got something to eat. Didn’t have any awkward pauses or anything. Talked a bunch. She seems very nice and I found her attractive definitely. I’m really bad at judging things. It could have went great for all I know what she is thinking. Before we left we mentioned about hanging out again. I texted her a bit later to say I had a nice time and recommended another place to go when she is free. She said it sounds good, so hopefully we will hang out again. Overall I felt pretty good spending time with her.
I know there were questions asked above, I will try tomorrow to respond more.
Belle,
That’s great that you and Aphrodite got together and had a blast. Sounds like a nice day. Thanks for the birthday wishes again.Aphrodite,
Belle mentioned you said I look like a friendly person from my picture…haha thanks. Also it’s weird that you said that is exactly what you thought my ex would look like lol. What did you mean? It’s funny because my friends wife never met her and she asked to see a picture. I showed her the one I shared with you and belle and she said that’s what I thought she would look like lol. I’m confused what this all means. Other than describing her personality I didn’t share much about looks to you or my friends wife. I guess I’m just curious why people have said that based on me describing my situation to them over the past few months.I did text her today’s when I was at work to say thanks. She responded quick even though she was at work which I was somewhat surprised about. As I thought she said oh I saw you went to AC and asked how it was and who I went with. Kept saying I just wanted to make sure you knew I reached out and didn’t forget. Said she was worried I didn’t get her first message because I responded to her mom and not her. She said he mom asked her for my number and she remembered all on her own.
I’m still pretty tired from the weekend…I guess I’m getting old and can’t hang like thwt anymore lol. Gonna turn in early tonight.
It seems like you all are doing pretty well…Thats very good gals.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.