My BreakUp Story and the start of my NC

[Baseballguy1996]

Glad to hear you guys are doing well! Keep it up! Keep me updated on you guys!

I’ve had a setback with my situation but reading your words make me feel stronger and better!

[patricia12]

You all have great ideas and encouraging philosophy about life and love:)
Wishing all of you the best..

[S.H]

Hey guys!
Glad the we are able to find support from each other here! Wishing all the best to each of you!

So a little update from me…
So me and my ex texted a few times after my last post but every time the topic is about bills,rent or stuff that have to be taking care of since she moving out from the apartment. (all “business” talk, never about our relationship)

So we havent been talking at all for some times now (after all the stuffs have been taking care of) but two days ago she suddenly sent me a link on FB message. And it was a link to a gif of a little bear. heres the link: http://imgur.com/gallery/zn7O7QW

That is so random. At first I didnt know what to reply, so I replied to her later that day saying haha its cute, and how it kinda remind me of her when she hold on to me when we have our tickle fights.
I try to be chill and also bring up a good memory. Its been two days and she hasnt reply yet even though she has seen my reply.

I know should not be desperate for her reply and I’m not. I’m just wondering should I initiate contact now that she have initiated contact? and is this a sign that she misses me or shes being confused? Also this is the first message she sent after our break up that is not about “business” stuffs.

What you guys think I should do or should not do? Also it been over a month since our break up now.

[Mister Handy]

hello S.H

It is an exciting news in my opinion 🙂

This means that somehow she still thinks about you and wanted to share something cool because it shows that anger is already decreasing. It may still be a little confused about you and the situation altogether. This is a good sign.

I think before you send a message to her, wait to see it will answer your last comment, or not.

I believe that if you do not know to be careful, you can scare her even more.

How many months have you broke up?

Wishing all of you the best

[S.H]

Hi Mister Handy,

It is exciting to see that she finally initiate contact with me. But at the same time its kinda scaring for me because I dont really know what is the right move to do now.

I agreed with you that I should be careful if I am going to send her messages so I dont scare her off or make me sound desperate.

Its been over a month since we have broken up.

Thanks!

[S.H]

So its been three day since I reply to her on FB. she still hasnt reply.

Im thinking send her a short message saying I’ve watched the show she suggested me to watch when we were still together. And that I love it and ask hows shes been.

Will this be alright? Its been over a month since our break up and I think maybe its time for us to start talking like friends again.

[Mister Handy]

hi S.H

How long were you in NC?

I had done two weeks the last time I tried to talk to my ex and she did not answer me 🙁 Now I will give more time.

I know she sent you a gif and this is a good sign, but can you give enough time?

I follow that way too, remembering good TV series memories.

Best.

[lin91]

Hi SH,

It’s good that you have been messaging a bit. However, I’d suggest leaving it a little longer before replying again. If it’s been 3 days now and she hasn’t responded, she probably isn’t sure why she sent you the picture in the first place. It’s good she’s contacting you but she is probably a little bit confused too.

So I’d say wait at least a week until you reach out again.

[S.H]

Hi Mister Handy and lin91,

My first NC was on 8th of July, but I talked to her after a while and then she wishes me Happy Birthday on my bday and we talk a bit. So patricia12 advised me to start my new NC from my birthday which was 16. So its been 26 days since.

Thanks for input! Yea I agreed with what you guys said. After more thinking I think I should gave her more time to respond again (if she wants to) and to also hopefully show her that I’m not needy for her respond/attention. Even though to be honest I still really care about her and want to talk to her.

Thanks again, I’ll keep you guys updated!

[S.H]

Hey guys,

So quick update, last night I was out with some friends and one of them told me that Im not compatible with my ex is because of our zodiac. Im a cancer and my ex is a gemini.

So i read online about how a gemini girl would behave, but I gotta said my ex was not flirty/or super outgoing person like they described. She dont go to parties/clubs (just like me) and she doesnt have tons of guys friends. She does make me feel insecure but because she send more time on her work than us prior to the BU.

So according to the “zodiac law”. Cancer and Gemini are not that compatible but I never believe in these stuff before but im kinda unsure now. I dont know does this stuff really are one of the reason why people are great or not great with each other.

I really want her back , but could this also be one of the sign that maybe we are just not for each other….:(

[lin91]

People are incompatible for all kinds of different reasons, but their zodiac signs are not one of them. It’s fine for your friend to have their beliefs, but don’t let that cloud what you know and what you want to work on.

[Baseballguy1996]

I agree with lin on this one. It’s ok to believe in those things. I would say you must believe in those things independently and not because someone else tells you to believe in them. If you truly believe in them, that’s one thing but don’t start believing in them just because your friend does.

[Mister Handy]

I agree with you LIn and Basebaulguy!

Sometimes we put the blame of our problem or failure on things not material.

But I believe even more, that people have the strength to draw their destinations more than anything.

It is not our religion, beliefs, race, color, which will decide our fate!

[S.H]

Thanks guys! Your words really makes me feel better and it does make sense.I guess I just had a moment of weakness…

My future/my own life is control my non other forces than myself.

Whether I want my ex back or not, I know I gotta do the things I need to to be a better man. And since I do want her back, I should work harder to be sure that if I do get her back I can be a better lover for her.

Thanks again guys! Wishing you all the best too!! 🙂

[S.H]

Hey guys

So today Im feeling kinda lost…my ex hasnt reply me (not really expecting she will, but to be honest I still hope that she surprisingly will reply me something).

So everyday I have been doing something like going out with friends/gym/meditating/and doing the worksheets from Kevin, etc. I do feel better than a month ago, but I dont know…today Im feeling down. I feel like some of the emotions just come back from deep within my heart or something. I really miss my ex and I start to wonder what if no matter what i do I can never be with her again. ( I know I should be ok with that fact IF it does happen).

I know I should be a better person for myself, and I can be better for myself and future partner even if her wasnt my ex. I know I should focus on working myself, stop thinking of what if and that sometimes things just happen and that is life.

But I cant help but feeling sad… I want her to be more than a chapter of my life and not my whole life and be with me till the end. But I also know that if that doesnt happen ,its out of anyones control. But it is just really sad…

I guess maybe deep down I know I may never be able to fully let her go… today is definitely one of my weak days *sigh

[Author]

Posts