-
Posts
-
Hello all, I was struggling for the past few days and was feeling so down that I didn’t want to spit them all negative stuffs out here but I read your posts. I can’t really be sure about how do I really feel as I’m trying to accept and not accept the facts, each day pass I feel different and weird, thinking about many things and too much sometimes when I get lost with the thoughts I stop myself telling what the heck are you doing to yourself. This is sick really I never ever been like this before but it shall too pass I hope. I don’t even remember what I see in my dreams
Yes maybe that’s probably you’re still hurt @annakis and I say that too that I don’t want him anymore but its cuz of anger and hurt too maybe and i just kid myself saying it
@annakis forgiving yourself is so important. I felt a weight had been lifted once I had forgiven myself and accepted it. I was beating myself up so much. I sort of have those feelings. But for me more like giving up, I think to myself hang on a minute, I’ve done so much to get myself back to normal that it makes me angry that he won’t give me the time of day! It’s what stops me from reaching out to him. I think you are doing really well in the healing process, especially feeling that way sometimes.
@malinda how are you feeling now? It is normal to feel that way my dear, up and down on a regular basis. Just remember that you have to focus on yourself x
@KD1988 feeling better I guess thank you dear. I’m thinking about meeting up friends this evening. How you and @pineappleblue doing ? Xx
@malinda yes definitely spend time with friends 🙂 makes you feel better.
I’m not doing too bad I suppose! XHi guys, sorry I initiated conversation then didn’t post for all morning!
@malinda I’m doing okay thanks! Feeling strong the last couple of days but still hurting inside! It seems you have been struggling a little 🙁 don’t feel you can’t let it out to us, we know what your going through and we can try and make you feel better!
@annakis forgiveness is very important otherwise you just hold onto the bitterness forever! But KD is right, you do need to forgive yourself too because we all beat ourselves up over things we think we did wrong and things we think we contributed to the breakup! I know I do.. I’m forever telling myself if I had just appreciated what I had and not always pushed for more then just maybe he wouldn’t have left! I hate the feeling he ever thought he wasn’t enough coz he really was! I told his mum this and she told me that I have nothing to apologise for and it was only natural to want those things after 6 years! So I have to get over that and accept that it shouldn’t have played a part and I’m not in the wrong!
In answer to your question, yes I do sometimes think sod it! But then I remember how special we were together and I think I’d do just about all in my power to get that back.. Whether I can is out of my control but I won’t give up!
@KD1988 I’m glad your managing to forgive both you and him! It does make you feel better doesn’t it? I feel like we’re getting somewhere! It may not be the place we wanted when we first started writing on here but it is moving on.. Which scares me and makes me happy all at once! I don’t want to forget the love I have for him but I can’t hold onto it forever if he doesn’t love me back.. It would be self destruction!!
Sorry for the HUGE essay! Haha!@pineappleblue that’s exactly how I feel. It scares me to let go, and I know im not ready to totally let go. But I know for my own sake I have to take a step back a little bit. The forgiveness played a massive part for me. I had to forgive myself to try and move on. I’m not sure if I’ve quite forgiven him yet for his part, but I am getting there! I’m working on it anyway haha. I would still like to see him, but for whatever reason he won’t see me, I can kid myself that it’s because he has feelings still, but it could be that he’s completely disinterested! Id like to think that wasn’t the reason and it doesn’t make me feel better to think that so I’m not going to haha x
It’s funny you say about kidding yourself because that is exactly how I feel at the moment!!! Like I’m just kidding myself..
I watched ‘he’s just not that into you’ last night and it was good but so depressing coz they were saying like if a man doesn’t text or call, it’s not for any other reason than he doesn’t want to.. In the end it turns out that there are exceptions but I was just like great, says it all! 🙁
I’m not sure iv forgiven him for letting me get excited about the house and start planning the future, but other than that I have nothing to forgive him for! well not that I know of anyway..And I’m also just kidding myself too still madly waiting for a call or text or email, and now reading if a man doesn’t call you or text you means that he just doesn’t want to made me feel sad which sounded logical and true :s
Whilst it is true that if they wanted to talk they would… However, we don’t know the reason why they don’t want to. It could be that they just simply don’t, or its likely they actually find it painful to talk to us. Or they just simply aren’t ready too. I do feel like I am kidding myself, but I kind of have to to make this less painful! X
@malinda I’m so sorry that is not why I said it.. I don’t want you to feel there is no hope coz in the end there where exceptions to the rule x
No I know you didn’t, please don’t be sorry @pineappleblue I might have even thought about it before but just reading it made me realize you know, all is fine really. I’m feeling much better today
Good, I’m glad you are. I’ve had a positive day in the end too!
Iv decided to look into going back to uni to be a midwife next year, which sounds crazy as its not at all like what I do now (although I do work at the hospital) but I’m ridiculously excited about it and everyone keeps telling me it’s amazing instead of thinking im having a nervous break down which I thought they would! 🙂
I also had the very real realisation tonight that im okay without him and im feeling positive about life without him! Its actually made me feel really at peace with myself x@pineappleblue that’s really good! Having something exciting to work towards is brilliant!
Ah I’m glad you feel that way 🙂 it’s good to know we can survive without them, we may not always want to but knowing we can is much better x
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.