Boards › Reconciliation › its only day 5 of NC and shes reached out twice
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January 8, 2015 at 3:44 pm #23413
yeah but she’s already heard my harsh comment so its like taking it back if i say something else ๐ like she will think ‘he’s just said something else because i got offended’ I got some advice to just send a smiley face to her last reply lol wadya think ?
January 8, 2015 at 3:57 pm #23416okay so I said
‘Im sure it’ll be alright :P’
‘anyway I’m out’
‘take care :*’and she replied saying ‘fine’
do I still stand a chance ๐ I feel like I just ruined it for myself ๐
January 8, 2015 at 7:29 pm #23438HELP ๐
January 8, 2015 at 8:42 pm #23440sorry i didnt see theese..
Try the NC nowJanuary 8, 2015 at 9:04 pm #23443So 30 days from now right?
And NC from now because I’ve made my intentions clear or is it because of something else?
January 8, 2015 at 9:18 pm #23445I agree, start NC now. Because now they know you are not just ignoring them to be mean.
Work on yourself, you sound way too emotionally dependent on every little thing is being said. Use the NC to get healthy again.
January 9, 2015 at 4:14 am #23474yh that makes sense. How do I sound emotionally dependent maria lol
January 9, 2015 at 10:14 am #23526You seem to be focusing too much on the little things that are said; if you said the right thing, did she mean something else etc.etc as if the right words would change the situation….
If you focus on the bigger picture, it will help you not be so dependent on being perfect.January 9, 2015 at 12:11 pm #23549right ๐ its just hard to see the bigger picture because trust me she was the one and i don’t want to lose her and just would hate if the things between us were ruined ๐
how do I focus on the bigger picture :/
January 9, 2015 at 5:27 pm #23571You have to detatch yourself from her a bit, become more like you were before, only two things can come out from this.
When you move on, you build up yourself, and if she comes back you win, if not, you win because u have moved on. Read the 5 steps, you are in the NC now, then its time to become more confident, become happy again, if she comes, thats great, if not, you are already great. Of course, its easy said than done, however, you have to make the stuf that you should do before contacting her, there is a check list=)January 9, 2015 at 5:39 pm #23573Agree with Hells,
You have to force yourself to work on improving all the other areas of your life.
And some of it is, just telling yourself that you will be okay even if she does not come back, it sucks! but you have to do it because otherwise you will just prolong your suffering.January 9, 2015 at 7:44 pm #23587tbh its hard because I’m not picturing an outcome other than us and I know that’s bad but its so hard
And yeah I’m making changes lol listed all my flaws and working on each of them this month
My nc officially started when she said Fine and I’m joining gym Monday
January 10, 2015 at 8:00 am #23483Arjun I just read this thread now n wanted to say u were not too harsh! U were perfect. Plus she is the one tht wanted to break up so u don’t have to be nice to her n replying her text was nice enough. I’m a girl, I know wat she’s thinkin. If u be nice n spare her feelings.. It’s worst. She needs to see the harsh side of u to appreciate the good side tht u had n she gave up on ..
Hope it helped ๐ sarahJanuary 10, 2015 at 10:36 am #23650oh wow thats such a nice bit of advice ๐ that helped a lot ๐ what would I need to do in order to make her think more about me lol.
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