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I’ve always been the type of person who always thinks about other people before myself. When my ex and I broke up I told him that I would always be there for him whenever he needed me because I thought that was the right thing to do. I really do care about him and I don’t like to hear him suffer, but now I’m thinking that’s a bad idea. I feel like he’s only going to talk to me so he can use me to feel better about himself again. He called me crying the other night and I gave in and called him back, but all he called me for was because his new “relationship” just took a turn in the opposite direction. He confessed this had happened before and he’s scared it’s happening again. He said he trusts me to tell him the truth and that everything will be okay, but he was still texting her while he was talking to me. I don’t want to be used anymore, but I also don’t want to break my promise about always being there for him. I don’t want him to think I’m abandoning him because I know he’s felt that way about me before, but I don’t want him to treat me like a doormat.
He changed his mind and said he wants to stay friends with me, but I know that’s not going to work because that’s what he did with two of his past girlfriends and he ended up sexting them while we were together and also the girl he’s with now.
I am so confused. I’m really trying to focus on bettering myself right now and trying to make it at least 30 days without talking to him, but uuugggh I can’t help being the kind and generous person I have always been. And I’m really tired of people telling me I deserve better; I don’t like thinking that he’s lower than me or anybody else. This is more of a venting post than an advice post. Thanks for reading!
Screw deserve better. While I was with my ex, even strangers would tell me I look like a movie star, and I deserve a man who can buy me a mansion and sport cars. I told them that my worth isn’t based on money. It is about how much my man cherishes me and shows me his fidelity, trust, love, understanding, care, and patience towards me. I wasnt someone who makes me happy,
I know NC is hard. It really is. But you really need to let your self love take actions instead of feelings, and when you better yourself thru NC, you will be able to do so. 🙂
I dont know about you, but I consider sexting cheating. NC will give you clarity on whether you still want this person back. My ex’s best friend, the guy who was going to be our best man at our wedding told me that once a liar is always liar and once a cheater is always cheater and to move on, and that I deserve better. But it is so hard. All the memories, feelings, and shared moments…
Good luck, and I feel like your situation is a bit similar to mine but mine is even worse :'( I would appreicate any persepctive!
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