I want to know if I can ever get back with my ex

[muranoalicia]

I would appreciate some sound advice here please.

I am a girl in my mid 20’s. I was with a guy for nearly 2 years who was a year and a half older. We broke up a year and a half ago now. When we were together, we were very in love. He told me he wanted to marry me within a week of meeting and we practically did everything together for almost 2 years. We spoke about our future, children and talked about planning a life together.

We broke up after we did long distance for 3 months. We usually always had heated arguments, not all the time but we had a few whilst together. We would however always find a way back together. So when we went long distance, after 3 months of going at it we argued and he said he wanted some space. We got back together and broke up again and again within those two month of arguments. I broke up with him too but I didn’t mean it deep down… I think that hurt him at the time. This was a horrendous 2 months in which we argued every single day!!

At the time we were breaking up, I was really immature and acted out of order. In the sense that I was calling him and crying to him and grovelling I guess. To the point where he called me petchulant etc. He eventually blocked me on Whatsapp which really hurt and every time I called with a different number, as soon as he would hear my voice he would hang up and block the number. This massively hurt me! And I felt so disrespected and belittled by someone I thought I was close to.

Eventually he started dating other girls… he was having fun. 8 months after we broke up, I randomly bumped into him on the street. He crossed the road and said hello but to be honest, I was cold and said only hello back and carried on walking. I only did this because I knew I was still blocked on his phone and I didn’t understand why he would take me so for granted that he’d block me for all those months and expect to stop me
On the street and chat. I didn’t feel like he deserved any of my time and I had already felt belittled by him. That was how I felt. Please tell me if I made a mistake.

Then about 6 months after that, I was at a concert with a male friend and he was there with his friends. Because he saw me with a boy, he grabbed a random girl in the room and started flirting and dancing with her. Please tell me what that is supposed to mean or if he’s over me and not interested, why feel the need to do that?

I felt bad after this because I felt like it could have burnt more bridges but that’s what happened.

A mutual friend then asked him about our breakup a month after seeing him at the concert. He told this friend that we broke up because I was pushing him to marry me in 2018 and I was insulting his family. I don’t understand why he said that because from my perspective, that’s completely not true. The only thing I agreed with was he said I got extreme. That’s it. He did say I was a great girl all in all and that it just didn’t work out for him. But why say I was pushing him to marry when he told me within a week he wanted to marry me. And I was never pushing him because I was still a student. Why would he use that excuse please?

I then saw his brother last month at an event. I was so surprised because he was also cold and distant… not like he was before. Why is his brother different towards me? It it because my ex may have painted me negatively and said I was offensive towards their family? Which I really wasn’t and regret that he would say such a thing. So basically didn’t really speak to his brother either when we saw each other.

Lastly, I saw him yesterday in a hotel (we live in a really small town and community) on a date with a girl I believe he just met recently. She is just like me… very similar to me. My ex didn’t talk to me but to be fair I didn’t talk to him either and I didn’t even smile when I saw him. Did I make a mistake there as well?

I know I’ll bump into him and his brothers again in the future. I just want to know if there is any chance or am I just dreaming because he is truly the love of my life with all of this he’s the one I’ve always loved. So what do I do? And do I even have a chance in hell? Our breakup was just so bitter that it ruined everything and now I don’t know how to fix anything!

Please help. Thanks x

[patricia12]

@muranoalicia Arguments, breaking up and then off and on again, calling him from different numbers… These are not good signs! You ask a lot of questions, but no one can answer with any surety. It’s been 1 1/2 years since the breakup and he’s obviously moved on. You should consider doing the same, but whenever you see him or his brother, just be polite.

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