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yes for real lol. cant wait for your tomorrow date with him, you should be next in line to get yours back. 🙂 just act friendly and wait on him to talk to see what hes gonna say to you this way you’ll know what to say and how hes feeling. it’d be great if he told you to get back together. 😀 lets wait and see. 😀 I was reading relationship rewind and ugh. its so difficult. :-/ im trying but some stuff is impossible for me to do as it makes no sense to me and I have nothing to say to him in certain aspects. hmm. Im pretty sure im at deaths door, :-/ not a nice place to be at. ugh. lol.. have ya read it?
I would be over the moon happy if he asked to get back together tomorrow but i highly doubt that he will but hopefully it will be a step in the right direction. Yeah I read it but i find it confusing. I’ve also read some other articles online and not everyone agrees that NC is the best way to get your ex back. Honestly though, be happy that your husband hasnt gone through with the divorce yet and you havent signed the papers, have you?
no none have yet to happen but I fear the day is near to come. I have no idea whats on his mind and im scared to ask or find out. Im not sure if him getting mad at my oldest for saying he was going out on sat was a godd sign he didnt want me to know. but him not contacting me and responding to me scares me off. why does this have to be so hard. I really feel like hes forgetting me. 🙁 ugh idk anymore. 🙁
Maybe he’s acting this way because he felt ignored by you during NC. The fact that he didnt want you to know he was going out means that he still cares.. Otherwise he wouldnt care if you knew or not. He isnt forgetting you, he is just taking some space. Do you feel like no contact will work on him?
If he wanted to divorce you, he wouldn’t wait this long.
You told us he has papers all filled up but he didn’t do anything right?
This is a damn good sign. You should be confident. And feel happy and work on yourself.. its so good to see you have learnt so much from your mistakes.thanks girls, he showed up here and gave me the cold shoulder. didnt say hi to me or anything. I even notice he was stepping away from me. :'( im here crying now, im not sure if he saw sadness in my eyes when my oldest told me to open the door. I lost him already. :'( I really miss him so much. why is this happening to me? ugh I hate my life. im left lonely he took my kids. 🙁
ok now i can write this better so here it goes. my husband was talking to my mother inlaw on the phone. supposedly he called her because he said he thought it was her because it said private. (so either he lied or some ass hole called him on private. 🙁 ugh) anyways he said to her that he was gonna pick up the kids. my youngest came to tell me and I went to my mother in laws room to see what was up but as shes in there talking to him he shows up. (he always does that and its really annoying) (btw he hadnt called or text me at all today.) ugh. so when he came in he gave me this weird look and didnt even say hi. so I kinda smile and said hi. he walked out of the room. so then I went outside the room to and he was talking to his mother. I forgot about what. I came to my room to get a water and went back out offer him one but he declined. anyways I kept trying to talk to him but he would rarely look in my eyes and what not. anyways I came in the room and went back out. how ever I notice him trying to move away from me. when I went to show him my youngest hair he was moving away from me. 🙁 so what I did was move away from him. I dont think he notice any of this. but I did. anyways so after asking him to pick up the kids at school (I think hes on vacation this week and isnt saying anything because he wanted to take the kids to school today, picking them last night to get them today.) and now he got them tonight. anyways so I said bye to him and he said bye and then I did what he does to me and said peace and made the peace sign lol and he did it to but I was closing the door as he was doing it lol. then my oldest asked me to open the door really quick, I forgot why and I think he saw the sadness in my eyes but am not sure because I was trying to wait for him to leave in order for me to cry. anyways after im in my room my oldest says mommy daddy said you can come to thanksgiving. and then I hear him say maybe mommy can come for thanksgiving. (i dont need pity from anyone). then I stood in the room and waited till he was down and I went to the window. I was seeing them leave I got there when they were about in the car but this time he didnt look up. 🙁 okay my questions are. what do you think about this whole situation about today? why was he giving me a cold shoulder? why was he moving away from me? why was he avoiding eye contact at first? why did it look like he made a mad face at me when he came in? (could he have been mad about yesterday? why was he acting all crazy this way? why was he trying to have a light conversation with me at the end? why would he want to invite me to thanksgiving dinner at his sisters? (for pity)? I dont need this. I really miss him so much. I feel so hurt by all of this I feel like im never getting him back. 🙁 what do you guys think of this whole situation. could anyone answer me these questions? I really want to get him back. anyone please help me. thanks 🙂
Honestly, I have no idea what he is thinking, but we need to get your spirits lifted. Do you remember how you were before the kids and when you first got married? Maybe try to think back to that woman and get some of her back.
I don’t think the Thanksgiving invite is pity. It might be a little bit, but I think having Thanksgiving with him and the kids and his other family will be a good opportunity to demonstrate how well YOU are doing. Keep your spirits up, and go have a great Thanksgiving. If he is an ass at Thanksgiving, then just act like you could care less.
You keep saying you miss him. And I totally feel you there. I miss my ex too so much, and here is the thing… There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. You are allowed to miss him, but don’t let missing him take over your whole life. When that thought comes to you, “I miss him so much.” Just say to yourself, yes, I do miss him. Then do something else. Then the thought will come again like every 5 seconds. Just keep missing him and choosing to do something else.
This is someone very important to you. Never feel like you can’t miss him and love him. What you do is in your control. There is always a possibility that you won’t get back together. But it is also possible that you definitely will get back together. No one can predict which will happen. All you can do is love him, miss him, and LIVE your life as your awesome self. If he doesn’t choose you, then he makes bad choices.
I don’t think he would have even considered that you go to the thanksgiving dinner if he didnt want to see you and if he didnt miss you. I honestly dont think that he is doing it for pity – he might be doing it for the sake of the children but lets wait and see what happens. If he does ask, I think you should go. It will be a great opportunity to show him the new you 🙂
Don’t play too much into how he was acting, it could have been a bunch of different reasons. 🙂And i think you played it out really well with saying hi to him etc – well on you!!! 🙂
I agree with what @cassie just said.
You did great. And its quite possible he is trying to avoid you so that he won’t feel the pain of separation. You also ignore him sometime, right? But in reality you’re just dying to be with him. So take it in a positive way and good luck 🙂@Sunshine11 thanks for the reply. 🙂 your right with what your saying. it so hard to accept but I will try the tip you told me about. I will try to bring some of her back but maybe what everyone was telling me a long time ago was true. ever since I had my oldest I suffer from depression, meaning in order for me to have full effect of that strong confident person I used to be I may need to take depression meds. thing being my doctor told me once I start taking them I need to take them for ever and this is something I’ve been debating with for a while other then what if I cant get the meds because of no insurance. my husband is planning on getting me off his insurance when it ends in December and wants me to apply for government help. ugh this is so stressful and annoying. but I may have to take those pills in order to “become that happy confident person” ugh, how annoying. I hope I do get him back, but like you said only time will tell. until then the only thing I can do is keep improving myself. yesterday I notice he was wearing a tank top and he grew more muscle meaning hes hitting the gym like crazy. I mention the gym to him once through text and he didnt say anything back, same as I told him we should hangout to catch up one day. what im getting from this is that some how some way he still has his defenses way up there and I feel like the more time that passes he will forget about me.I have no clue how his defenses will come down and how long it will take for them to come down. I feel like im never gonna get him back and this hurts really bad. I hate this feeling. 🙁 btw (almost every time he calls he says my name, instead of saying hey this this and that, like he left me a message this morning saying hey my name and the message, in voice mail of course) why does he do this? its really irratating and annoying to me. what do you think? thanks 🙂
@cassie thanks I dont see anychange happening with us. I hate this feeling. (he called this morning (left me a voicemail,I saw when I woke up this morning, saying my name I hate when he does that, why cant he just say what he needs whats the point of saying my name? its so annoying and hurtful.) could it be a defense mechanism? ugh Im not sure if I would go, it depends on a lot of factors. but other then pity your right he probably felt bad for the kids so maybe thats why he was saying that. ugh this hurts so bad. 🙁 what do you think?
Using someone’s name in calls and texts is very positive! It makes the message more direct to you. Its can be a sign of flirting or more formal.
Personally I would take it as a good sign 🙂
@divjun thanks it could be thats why hes trying to avoid me but this hurts so much. I do in a sense of a way. maybe a defense mechanism? but when will his defenses stop? this is so painful to me. ugh 🙁
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