He contacted me..what does he want?

[Girly]

Thank you all for your support…I’m feeling really sad today and trying to make sense of it all..although I did some begging I think I also showed some strength on Sunday..here is the communication. Please tell me what you think and if you think I will hear from him again..

Me: As much as I’ve thought about it, I know I’m right with the condoms. In the course of a year I know I’ve been in your bag several times at your request and no condoms were ever there. I so wanted to believe otherwise but I’m sure of it. I’m ok moving on knowing that I wasn’t valued for the loving woman that I know I am and that moving forward I will be with the person that values me.

Him: they were in there all the time.
(Note: he is OCD and always cleans his bags out. He has asked me several times to go in his bag over the course of a year..I’m pretty darn sure)

Me: I know they weren’t and you cannot convince me otherwise

Him: you are 100 percent wrong

Conversation ended at 3..

730 pm:
Him: Listen, I get that you’re sad and disappointed that it didn’t work between us, but please stop with your accusations because it’s offensive and uncalled for. I never took that bag to any other place than your house. I even forgot that those condoms were in there, but I can tell you they were there the entire time. Perhaps you didn’t open that side pouch. For the record, I don’t recall ever asking you to go through my bag.
Best of luck with your new job stef. I genuinely mean that.
Me: I’m completely right and it’s all good.im ok with moving on I’ve never had someone be so cruel and it’s not what I want in my life
Him: You’re not right. I wasn’t cruel, but say what you need to say
Me: I don’t need to say anything and I’m done.I know the truth and that’s all that matters.

Him: ok whatever

I deleted him from BBm and blocked him on Facebook.

[a.z]

I’m pretty sure he will contact you.It depends on you whether to get back with him or not.But if you want him back,you should continue NC and wait for him to contact you and there is nothing you can say to prove that he is lying.
Its really up to you whether to forget about what he did/didn’t or continue arguing about it which is not gonna help you.

I think even if he did something during the break up,he had all the right to do it.both of you were single and you could do anything you wanted.
But you need to think if your really gonna have a long healthy relationship with him or not.You are more important than him ,Your happiness is the most important thing and you should put yourself before him.That gives you more value.

[Girly]

I agree 100 % with your comments.. Whether he did anything or not, we were broken up however I just don’t want to be lied to. On the other note, I only want him back if he comes whole heartedly..otherwise we will end up just as we are not..broken up again…. Should I ignore him initially if he contacts me or respond?

[a.z]

You can talk to him when he contacts you.Tell him you have already said everything you wanted from a relationship and if he really doesn’t want the same thing ,then its ok and you think this isn’t gonna work and say that you need to move on.

[Girly]

Thanks..some good advice here..

[Girly]

Having such a hard time with this..haven’t heard from him and don’t know if I will. I’m afraid he will move on..and won’t come back..I know I can’t give in and contact..

[a.z]

Its been just 1 day :O .Be patient he is not moving on anytime soon.

[Girly]

Thanks a.z..it’s been 3 days and I know he’s on tinder.not to mention I still don’t know where he used those condoms.. 🙁

[a.z]

I understand you but you don’t really need to know where he used his condoms.
When i broke up with my ex ,i went on too many dates.I had sex and non of them made me forget about my ex.I didn’t even feel anything for them.I know it hurts but you don’t need to imagine him having sex.You were not together and there is nothing you can do to change the past.Trust me even if he slept with someone,he did nothing wrong.

Forget about it.Seriously its not that bad ( I really really understand you but i’m trying to make you understand the fact ). Don’t think about it too much,it only makes everything more complicated and makes the problem look bigger than what it really is.Why don’t you look at the bright side? You are saying that you think he slept with someone.Even if he did,he came back to you.You are his choice not anyone else.
When my ex asked me if i had sex with someone or not, I said i didn’t because i loved him.He ex loves you.

[Girly]

Thanks a.z what you said helps a lot… But do you really think I will hear from him again? He told me he is completely over after that incident…

[a.z]

Doesn’t matter.Don’t focus on what he said.I think he will contact you.He is just sad/angry or anything like that.It’ll pass after a little while and he will begin to miss you again.

[Girly]

Thanks a.z 🙂

[a.z]

Your more than welcome 🙂

[Girly]

Day 4 of NC and I’m worried it’s done..so much has happened and I feel he may never contact me. Is there anything I can say to him or must I keep to NC?

[sunshinegirl]

Hey Girly –
It’s only day 4! Don’t lose your hope so quickly! Give him time to start missing you! 🙂

You can do this! I know you can!

[Author]

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