Boards › Reconciliation › Delayed/Repeated NC
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December 11, 2014 at 9:16 am #18533
Hi Pixie25, wow, did he really phone you for the first time in months? This MUST mean that he is genuinely missing you. Why would he do that? You know him better than any of us: do you really think he would be cruel enough to just do that to play with you? I hope, for your sake, that he’s not, and if he is, I hope that that realization might help you finally get him out of your life. But if it’s the former case – ie that he genuinely misses you – then I’d suggest you keep doing what you’ve been doing; do respond to him when he initiates contact (but don’t initiate yourself), and keep your conversations and exchanges light and fun. DONT bring up anything emotional, don’t talk about the breakup, and see if you can, following Kevin’s advice, get him to see you?
I think the fact that he’s calling and texting is really a positive sign; you didn NC for as long as I did – 50+ days – and he didn’t reach out to you even once then. The fact that he’s doing so now must mean something. I don’t want to give you false hope, I know how dangerous that can be, so I’ll repeat here that only you can judge the sincerity of his actions, because you know him.
One last thing: If he doesnt respond, don’t worry too much about it, maybe he’s busy at work?
Maybe he’ll call you again today! Maybe… I hope… that he’ll agree to meet you soon. I’m excited for you, and will keep my fingers crossed for good news. Keep us posted!
And if he doesn’t, and if after phoning and texting he just disappears again, give it a few more days, and then really see if your heart can take this constant “up and down” for much longer….
Either way, I’m here for you, and will be checking in frequently…December 11, 2014 at 11:25 am #18538Hi SM,
Thanks for being kind and helping us all out still 🙂
Yes he phoned me. we’ve been talking since the start of November, gradually and now regularly. We’ve been having a few texting arguments over the last few days. He keeps trying to draw me out on comments i.e. asking me do I miss him. I keep trying to avoid saying anything to feed his ego so get off the subject or stay aloof/make a joke but it’s really hard.
Anyway during one of the arguments I said you haven’t even phoned me in months and the next day he randomly phoned me mid texting.
Then last night he texted me at 3am randomly in response to a message the night before.
He keeps indicating meetings up but will never just come out and say do you wanna meet up next week – It’s like hes teasing me and waiting for me to come out and ask. I said to him that he never just comes out and asks to meet but he hasn’t acted on this.Like you say, I’ll leave it a few days see what happens but today he has seemed really busy with work again. It’s funny every time I rant on here about something, five minutes later I’ll see a text or something on my phone saying im sorry i seem uninterested just busy. Its so up and down with him
December 26, 2014 at 12:41 pm #21167How you doing Pixie25? Did your ex and you finally meet? I hope things are OK on your end.
December 27, 2014 at 4:29 am #21250Hi,
I’m good thanks. Hope you had a good xmas and got lots of nice gifts
December 27, 2014 at 4:30 am #21251Hi,
I’m good thanks. Hope you had a good xmas and got lots of nice gifts.
Things have developed somewhat my side. We’ve been talking/flirting consistently and we’ve agreed to meet up mid January (we’re long distance). I’m staying over but I’ve told him that sex is probably not on the cards. Have I said the right thing?December 31, 2014 at 3:31 am #22061That’s really good news Pixie25 and I’m so happy for you. Things seem to have progressed quite a bit since we last exchanged updates on this board. Good for you, and I’ll keep my fingers crossed for your meeting in Jan. Play it cool; try not to get your hopes up too much; and try just to enjoy spending time with him. DONT bring up the breakup or anything from the past unless he specifically wants to discuss it. GOOD LUCK. And, as for sex, I think your instinct is absolutely right. But if it ends up happening and you enjoy it then, well, why not?
Let us know how it goes! I’m rooting for you..!
As for me, no news at all from my ex; not even the briefest of greetings for christmas/new years. I’ve decided not to write either, unless he writes first. We exchanged emails in Nov and that was it. He doesn’t want me, that’s absolutely clear. I really hope 2015 will be a better year for me. I’ve spent so much time crying about this guy… god…
Hope 2015 will be a better year for you too!January 6, 2015 at 12:52 pm #23047Hi,
Feeling kinda low today, I don’t know why, I guess things aren’t happening quick enough and I’m getting impatient.
Starting to wonder if the whole meeting up thing is just a string he’s keeping me on.
One positive is that I haven’t initiated contact in a while, he’s done all the initiating, at least 5 conversations over the past two weeks.
We spoke yesterday and the phrase “if we meet up” came into the mix.
Well I was under the impression we WERE meeting up mid December, the date was discussed and he was getting back to me. Is he backtracking?
Any suggestions on how I can speed something along?January 6, 2015 at 12:57 pm #23048I meant mid January.
I’m guess all I can do is wait and see what happens over the next two weeksIf I wasn’t walking on eggshells trying to be all aloof and cool and sexy etc.! then I’d just ask him straight out what’s the deal with our meet up!!!!
January 6, 2015 at 2:47 pm #23053I can’t believe I forgot to mention this but he also sent me a Christmas present in the post.
Was a very random.When I think about it there seems to be positive signs but I can’t help but feel negative, it’s like I’m trying to protect myself from getting hurt again
January 17, 2015 at 5:32 am #24731I think it’s great that he’s been initiating contact, and that he sent you a christmas present out of the blue! What a huge improvement from last year! I think your instinct is right about the meet up: don’t press him about it; act cool and above-it-all. I hope it happens, but you should not press him about it. Let him set it up, if he really wants to, and if he doesn’t, then just wait and be patient. The key here is to signal to him that you don’t care…which is not true, of course! Good luck, and keep us posted! I hope that by now you’ve already met him and it went well!
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