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No no MrsWB don’t apologise we are here to open to each other and help each other. I’m currently on the bus to the train station and using the wifi about to get off so i will reply after university. Stay strong you are worth more than this.
I know I should learn a thing or two from you guys. You’re so full of hope and don’t give up do easily. But then because I’m female, I am wired to believe I should not chase after a guy. And that the guy is supposed to pursue women. But that also depends on the situation. Why would my ex come after me if he let me go in the first place?
I still have so much hope for Pingpong, and Ironblood is winning. Lol, you’re doing great. Just continue to keep cool! Do not overthink and just remember to keep things casusl… Like the way you are talking to us now. š
MrsWB,
They must be so hopeful because they are still pretty young and haven’t had other broken relationships before lol, older people like us have lost a little faith along the way, I think it’s normal.
I am still a hopeless romantic though and I do believe in love but it has certainly changed me through the years.
About the chasing, it does depend on the situation and the person, for example, my ex has dumped me two times before this last one and she’s the one who came back. Despite I said goodbye to her and let go of all the negative feelings, my heart won’t ever give up on her but my life has to continue. We can go on and keep that little warm flame of hope inside us, there’s nothing wrong with it.Fishingthesky: yes, they are really young, and at the same time, their positive attitude makes me smile. š
I miss my ex so much. I wish he came back for me. But yes, I just continue with life. Gotta pay the bills.
And you are right, it is still ok to have hope but letting go at the same time and not dwelling on it. The universe already knows it. No need to bug. If it is meant, it’ll make it happen. I still believe in fate and destiny.
Like they said: lose everything, but don’t lose hope.
How are you coping so far!
Well to be honest I am not old, I am just in my 30’s, but my history of long term relationships is already pretty extended and it makes me feel like I’m older than my real age lol.
I miss my ex too every day but I don’t think about her as much as I did a month ago, the fact that she has another guy definitely speeds up the moving on part I suppose.
I entered this sorta zen philosophy in which I try to be more positive about the future and grateful for what I’ve had in my life, her included, and what I have now.
I don’t know if you have read my personal story which is pretty tough, I have a thread if you wanna look at it.
I believe in destiny too and there is a reason why we meet certain people in life and never leave our hearts. You just need to be optimistic, the universe will respond to your reactions and feelings, giving you back the same you give.Fishingthesky, you may be right, we are young and haven’t experienced break ups before (ironblood has with the same ex) but for me this is my FIRST. It is a dam horrible feeling and how I feel today is I never ever want to get into another relationship ever cause this heart breaking pain is too much to handle. I would rather shoot my hand with a nail gun (which I have done before lol by accident) than deal with this type of pain. But yes I do still have hope as I don’t want to give up, just like yourself. Maybe it’s young love eh? (Can you guess where I am from with that word lol).
Your words really help me tho fishingthesky, as you are still young and wise as I appreciate MrsWB input so much as she is just like my mom and she is really keeping my head up. I will try to think like how you see things, that how grateful I was to experience everything with her. Maybe it’s a life lesson for the future. But my memories and love for her will never be forgotten. I kinda wish we had a bad break up so it could be so simple to move on. I feel like I am back to when I first got broken up cause I’m going wacko again. But time will heal me. I am just not dealing well with her seeing someone but this will help me move on faster.
Pingpong: I will guess Australia or Canada. This is such torture, huh? I am off today as I had to switch days off with a co-worker. We run a huge 24/7 business. I know I need to get my ass off bed and run errands. During this time, my ex drives home after the gym and texts me as soon as he gets home. I am missing him terribly and crying while I type this. I am losing all hope as it has been 8 weeks. Plus, he did say he did not want to see my anymore which hurts so bad because i never saw any signs of him not wanting to be with me and that I was the only thing that makes his time at work worth it.
I just have to take it what it is….that he had a switch that went off.
Ding! Good ol Canada. Will begin hiking the mountains to take some time off my mind. It is strange how we memorize our ex’s routines and schedule. As for my ex she will be starting school soon so won’t have a clue.. Hang in the MrsWB. Just let it out as you’ll feel much better. You will always be love by your friends and family. I know how you feel tho unfortunately I had tiny hints of the break up coming but must’ve been devastating for you. But keep you head up! Tomorrow is a new day.
So this morning I replied to her message and she said āThank you have a good day at uniā . So Iāve just got in and have replied āJust got in uni was good, howās your day been?āā¦ is this too generic? Should I be more interesting or is keeping it casual still suitable at the moment? I know sheās home and has received the message and she still hasnāt replied 20 mins laterā¦ Iām not overthinking but I just donāt want my bubble to be popped and for her to go into ānot interested at allā mode.
Ok as Iām typing this she repliesā¦ jheeze maybe I am over thinking. She replied āGood what did you do and yeah work was good thank youā. I donāt want the conversations to be generic and boring. But I then again donāt know how to keep them interesting considering we broke up less than 3 weeks agoā¦ LOL
Iām not sure what to even talk about at the moment. By the way, this morningā¦ or last night? Some time ago within 12 hours lol I saw my ex liking Instagram pictures of Amsterdamā¦ I think thatās weird since we talked about it again on the phone? I donāt know if im looking into it too much againā¦ but hey! Iām an overthinker I guess. I have to admit I really really do miss everything about her. But I am so so scared this is just a shamble to keep her self happy while she has no one to talk to.
Pingpong: Thatās a great idea for the coffee meet up. Iāve used that for past breakup between us and it has always worked. But not sure if itās too early or not? I will see how our communication develops and possibly ask her for this Saturday maybe.
I also do agree it is too early to add her on Facebook. I think the wound is still healing. I forgot to mention, last night on the phone I also brought up as a joke āso I see you blocked me on twitter and Instagramā ( I knew she didnāt block me on Instagram but just wanted to act as if she did ) and she immediately said āI didnāt delete you on Instagram and snapchat Iāve kept you and you deleted me on facebookā so I replied ā sooo?ā in a sarcastic voice and she giggled.
MrsWB: Judging from what you have wrote I agree with the ālotā of people that have said you were the strongest person they have met. I mean read back your story and try to tell me you are not. You are! Iām curious, I forgot exactly what you said to your last week but Iām pretty sure you yourself even said you didnāt try enough when you reached out? Not sure if you said that word for word but Iām pretty sure I read something like that. I do believe he has strong feelings towards you even though it may seem like he doesnāt. Itās quite obvious. Some one doesnāt just drop off the face of the earth and suddenly put a āI donāt like youā switch on. He obviously has feelings. He may not realise how deep but I am certain he does. To be honest not a lot of people find the perfect person and they do eventually go through a lot of relationships trying to find that person. But I donāt think it is entirely on you MrsWB. I donāt think you are crazy at all! You are not the only one! I DONāT THINK YOU HAVE SERIOUS FLAWS. I think from what I am reading your only āweaknessā not flaw, is like you said you panic that it is not going to work out. Maybe that was from your divorce that you adapted this feeling that all the relationships you get into are doomed but I donāt think that is the case. I think you need to work on not feeling like you are never going to be wanted. Donāt dwell on the bad things. Itās stupid to say but focus on the positiveās happening around you. When you are in a new relationship for example donāt just think itās going to end soon when it has literally only just begun. I hope you understand what Iām saying ā¦ lol. What I mean is, if you focus on negative things that havnāt even happened again like your habbit of thinking every relationship is not going to last, you may not realise it but it will reflect on your personality and your partner will know something is up. This could potentially push them away. Iām not saying this is the case but it could easily happen. It is insulting that our exās only think about their own feelings but itās the hard truth. My ex showed no mercy and was complete cold towards me. she didnāt even want to give me a taxi number so I could get home. The point is, our exās are cold heartless SOBās when they are tying to protect their own feelings. Itās a defence mechanism. Now I wouldnāt suggest you contact him this week but maybe just wait a week or week and couple days and try and contact him again if he hasnāt done so already. But this time donāt keep it too casual. Try and give a positive, fresh new vibe from the message you send him. Lol easier said than done but just research. I canāt give you exactly what to say cause Iāve never experienced getting a boy ex back lol. Remember you still have hope. And I see that. Donāt let it get you down until you know for certain it will never work out. At the moment keep you self as happy and positive as humanely possible.
p.s sorry for this huge text wall. Hope everyones doing good.
Also MrsWB Iām pretty sure Patricia12 is in a similar situation to you. She helped me with my 2 other breakups with my ex and I owe most of it to her. She is a very nice lady and your situation and age does seem very similar. Not trying to make you not avoid helping you or anything but from my perspective patricia12 would be the perfect person to help you and you would be the perfect person to help her! You both are very similar. Both very kind and strong.Ironblood: thank you so much for your kind words! I’m driving to run errands now, I will reply in a bit. Ok. You are doing good so far. But don’t make any jokes like “so, you blocked me” even though you know she did not. That’s playing games and putting words in her mouth. This is when the fight starts all over again. Like I mentioned, keep it casual. You do not need to find ways to keep conversations interesting. The fact that you are already in contact is such a HUGE development. Be thankful for that. I wish me and Pingpong had that. We don’t even get a simple “hello.” A simple “have a nice day” is a lot of progress. Keep that in mind. š
I will sure to take that advice but I have some bad news. I think it was what I suspected. So this is how the conversation went.
Me:”Just got in uni was good, how’s your day been?”
Ex: “Good what did you do and yeah work was good thank you”
Me: “I had a tour of the whole uni campus and it’s actually really nice. Just having dinner shall i call you after?”
Ex: “Good I’m glad, Urm I’d rather we talk on this tbh don’t want to be horrible it’s just cause I got upset after our phone call and hearing your voice makes it hard sorry I don’t want to be horrible but can we just talk on watsapp”It seems it’s just like i suspected. if she did really miss me and care she’d want to talk to me over the phone. it just shows she just wanted to speak to me to relive the pain of loneliness. i almost feel used. I’m pathetic. I don’t think i should have even replied to her “I miss you”. I should have ignored it. I feel so stupid. My bubble has burst. I FEEL LIKE AN IDIOT.
So I just replied “Yeah I know what you mean it’s just my messages were slow”
and she replied “Ok thank you for understanding. I’m receiving them”. What do I even do from here. I don’t even want to talk to her at the moment. I’m sick of these games. I just want her back. Am I doing the right thing?I just feel so stupid. I can’t even reply to her at the moment. I have no idea what to say. I feel like I’m back on square one!
Ironblood: if she said it was hard for her to talk on the phone, it is hard to talk to her on the phone. She missed your voice. And for her the best way to talk is thru watsapp. Because since you are already broken up, it’s hard for her too. And this is why we go back to the NC rule. There was no time for growing or healing, but at the same time, I was hoping that her reaching out to you first, she was ok just being casual. You both still harbour strong feelings for each other. Since she still wants to stay in touch, watsapp is the best option for her at this point. She is not playing you. What for? Who else is she missing? I do feel her feelings are so conflicted though. Again, keep it casual. But it’s proving so difficult for you now becuase you just want to be back in the relatiionship. š you know what you want, but I am not sure about her.
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