Strategies when you get angry at the situation?

[Anni]

So week 2 of NC is almost over, I have been concentrating on myself a lot, reflected what I did wrong and what went wrong in general, I’m trying to improve myself by doing new things and become more relaxed.

Sometimes feelings hit me (I believe everyone of you can relate) and I am able to deal well enough with the sad moments now when I can just distract myself and think about something else.
But sometimes I also get very angry at the situation and at my ex because I cannot understand why he treated me like that during break up, why this has ended like this, why he can deal with NC no problem and so on. When those feelings hit I write them down right away because I don’t want to feel the need to write my ex which would be unfair and also look needy. Writing down helps most of the time to get everything out and be more calm again but sometimes there are moments in which none of those strategies help.

Do you have those kinda moments too? How do you deal with them? Do you have any advice?

Have a nice day everyone 🙂

[Needhelp123]

In our mind, we make this idea that if we tell them the right things and make them see what they did wrong, they will realise that it wasn’t just our fault and will take us back.
Sadly that’s not how it works. If u tell a guy what u feel and what he did wrong, he will feel like you are trying to trick him into going back in a relationship with u.
Even tho they want that, they will never do it when they feel like it’s not their choice.

It’s a bit stupid when u think about it, or even childish.
I think that’s how their brain work haha

Anyway the whole idea of NC is to give them time to forget about the reason you guys broke up, give him time to think and for him to get the feeling that it’s him who wants to get back together.

[Mrtdg82]

It’s funny you should mention about getting angry.

I mentioned in my post but that’s how I reacted too. The further I go into NC the more angry I get and the less sad I am about it. It’s really given me strength.

2 weeks ago I would have taken her back in a flash.

I was dumped via text/Facebook status and never saw her again and any reconciliation on my part was thrown in my face. Every time an issue was countered, she found a new one as a reason not to see me.

That’s what I’ve learnt from NC, time give you a chance to reflect on everything and realise that it’s their loss not yours, especially when you give them every opportunity to resolve it. If they choose not too, for whatever reason, it’s their issue. The guilt will hit them sooner or later, whether they act upon that is another matter and is dependent on lots of things such as pride, stubbornness, outside influences (friends and family) and of course if they move on.

Being angry is a good thing, I wouldn’t worry about it.

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