NC after 21 days? Unique Situation

[Keelo]

So today is 21 days from my breakup. Little backstory. I was with my girlfriend for 4 years. Our relationship endured plenty of things including long distance for almost 2 years. About 6 weeks ago my girlfriend started taking time for herself. She has a lot going on with work, finishing her doctorate, health issues, possible depression. She just wanted to be alone and not deal with anyone including family and friends. We kept in touch but it was somewhat limited.

Eventually we met up and talked for 3 hours and she broke up with me. There was no fighting, yelling or cheating involved. She said she could not currently give me what I want in a relationship right now. With our crazy schedules we really only got to see each other once a week. On top of that her medical issues caused a problem in our sex lives which made me angry (typical selfish me). We both cried during our conversation as it was sad for both of us. She said things like this door is not closed and to keep in touch. We hugged said I love you and that was it. She texted me later that night saying Please don’t be hard on yourself I still really care about you. That was 21 days ago today and there has been no contact from her or myself. I guess the fact that she has not reached out to me is somewhat alarming.

Any advice?? IS now the time?? Over the last 3 weeks I have tried to become the best person I can be.

[jaici]

Don’t be alarmed, finish out the no contact and then message her. Just because she hasn’t messaged doesn’t mean she isn’t thinking about you.

[patricia12]

I’m sure your texts have been fine. Maybe a little flirty, but not vulgar, would bring a smile to her face. Maybe words or ideas that are kinda intimate and cute that only the two of you would appreciate. And use the pet names you have for each other. Because she seems to be so busy and has other issues, it would probably be best not to text very often. Give her some breathing room and time to deal with her other priorities she has at this time. Sounds like you love each other very much, but the timing just isn’t right for a good relationship at this time. Hang on and keep your chin up:) Have faith that things will get better in the future..

[Author]

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