Boards › Reconciliation › Meeting up with his mum..
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March 24, 2015 at 4:16 pm #37861
So last week my exes mum text me and asked if I wanted to go for tea (2 we were always very close), I agreed and were meeting tomorrow! How do you think I should play it? Should I tell her I’m not giving up or should I make it look like iv moved on and am over it?
She told me last time I saw her that she knows he will realise but she doesn’t know when and that he will always compare and so will the whole family..
So I just wondered what you all thought about what I let on and what I keep close to my chest?March 25, 2015 at 4:13 am #37903Anybody any advice? We’re meeting in 8 hours.
Colleagues at work this morning have told me i shouldn’t even be going, that it should be a clean break and i should leave it.. but they don’t know my secret battle to win him back!
So confused!
March 25, 2015 at 11:21 am #37946Ooh this is hard! You could go with acting like you’ve moved on and are totally over him… That might kinda get to him a little bit if his mum tells him that you looked happy and confident and over him… But is that what you want?
It sounds like a good opportunity to see what his mum thinks he’s feeling though… You never know what she might tell you π
March 25, 2015 at 12:01 pm #37958I think I’m gonna be strong and act fine (I am really), but she will know I miss him, were close so she will be able to tell!
To be honest im not sure he’ll have opened up to her much as he finds she tried to control his life.. But I am hoping she’ll have something new for me! Who knows! I’m say waiting now so I will keep you updated xMarch 25, 2015 at 12:07 pm #37960Good luck!
March 25, 2015 at 2:52 pm #37979Thanks @annakis
So it went okay! I got a little upset as his cousin was there who is 6 and she gave me flowers and a kiss and hug and it made me cry! Just a little overwhelming..
His mum said I look really good, that it was the first thing she noticed! π always a positive!
hes kept his cards very close to his chest with her too so she said she couldn’t give me any indication how he’s feeling but that she thinks I should text him to open the communication again.. She said she just doesn’t have a clue what will happen either but that I am doing all the right things.. As positive as it could be I guess?
March 25, 2015 at 4:23 pm #37991Mm, yes, definitely seems like a positive rather than a negative… I don’t tell my parents anything either so I imagine it’d be much the same if it was me.
How long have you been doing NC now?
March 25, 2015 at 5:25 pm #37995I’ll be 30 days tomorrow! :S I can’t work out if I’m ready or not.. I think I am but im nervous! How ridiculous is that?
He’s always been quite reserved with his emotions anyway! Which was why I was suprised that he cried when he said his goodbyes, I’d only seen it once before in the whole 6 years and it was when he told me he loved me for the first time (he’d had a few drinks too). So I don’t even know what that means?March 25, 2015 at 5:28 pm #37996Oh wow… Hrm I’m in the same place kind of, really considering whether or not to write my ex a letter… Something like the ‘magic letter’ but a little more heartfelt perhaps…
But like you I’m not sure if I’m ready! My head tells me to wait until I’m moved on a bit before I send it, wait until i’m more stable… But my heart is telling me SEND IT NOW!
March 26, 2015 at 7:50 am #38083I thought about the letter a lot! But i’m not sure how he’d take it..
Yes im nervous but getting antsy about texting him, i think i need to do it, but i do worry for my feelings haha!
March 26, 2015 at 8:15 am #38086Hrm yeah I know how you feel…
I just wrote my ex an apology letter… It’s mostly just me trying to take responsibility for what I did wrong and telling her that I’m sorry. I mentioned a little bit about how I’m trying to grow as a person too…
Really nervous about sending it, but I want her back in my life. Perhaps sending this will help, I dunno…
March 26, 2015 at 2:31 pm #38161How far into NC are you? Sorry if you’ve already told me, I lose track..
I definitely think if it’s been enough time then a letter won’t harm.. Just make sure it’s not obviously trying to get you back together π im sure you know that already..
You’ll have to let me know when you send it and what happens! I can’t decide whether to text mine tomorrow before I sort his stuff out on Saturday or on Monday after iv sorted it! I know he has plans with friends this weekend so don’t want to do it then! Do you think I should do Monday or tomorrow?
March 26, 2015 at 2:41 pm #38165Ooh hrm! Well if it were me I’d want to wait until monday simply because it’d give me time to get my head together, you know what I mean? Decide what I really want to say… But if you feel ready now, go for it π
March 26, 2015 at 2:56 pm #38170No I think your right.. I’ll wait until Monday!
I was literally just going to say that i have his stuff and give him the option of him getting it from me and meeting up to see each other or that I will give it to his mum! That way if he wants to see me he can but if he doesn’t or he’s not ready he doesn’t feel im pushing it. I was also going to say I hope he enjoyed his weekend as I know what he has planned and he’s been looking forward to it! Or do you think that looks too stalkerish? How familiar should I be when we haven’t spoken in what will be 5 weeks?March 26, 2015 at 3:09 pm #38180Hrm well personally I think it’d be fine to ask if he enjoyed his weekend as long as you keep it all light hearted and fun π Sounds like you’ve got a pretty good plan together.
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